Odds On Rooney Getting Dumped

Well well well, ‘ole Rooney couldn’t keep it in his trousers – What. A. Shocker.

Luckily, he now gets to join the illustrious list of young, dumb and over paid footballers who wouldn’t know fidelity if it was kicking their arses up and down a football pitch.

And, according to publicist Max Clifford, Rooney’s career would not be affected by the allegations.